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Circle of Gifts

8/30/2012

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We invited a farmer “teacher” and his wife over for dinner to discuss new possibilities for local food in our community.   The farmer’s wife had been to a library sale and picked up the first four editions of Foxfire Books just because she thought I would like them.  It wasn’t until summer had gone and winter had set in that I was able to pick them up and read them.  What I found was story after story of how a community was changed when they recognized the valuable gifts they were able to offer one another.   The stories were about real people with abilities to make or create things that others found useful.  This led me to ask, “What happened to community in the first place?”  Was it the introduction of transportation, televisions, or mobility due to school or jobs?  It seems that whatever the cause, the deep sense of community is something that takes a lot of work to find.  And progress and monetary gain don’t seem to be the solutions we thought they would be.  Maybe, just maybe, the act of giving is the key to finding what is most meaningful in our lives.

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These books were given to me by a friend (because she thought I might like them) and what's inside has taught me to see the stories behind the ordinary people who surround us.  To value what can be bought locally from those who have worked hard to learn skills that make, grow, prepare, and develop the things that are useful in life.  I've learned to value what we are able to grow for others while finding joy in giving things away or asking for things when I find myself in need.  I’ve found that the relationships developed from this circle of giving and receiving cannot be bought in a store.
In the not so distant past people depended on one another.  Community was a way of life and our need for the farmer and the seamstress allowed us to build relationships around the objects in which we made trades or financial commitments.  This seems to have been replaced by a system where everything and everyone are replaceable.  If something breaks we just buy another one.  If the store doesn’t have something we want then we just go somewhere else.  It seems that if we lost community when we didn’t need one another anymore that maybe it’s possible to find it again through what some call the circle of gifts.

When I decided to change from being a full-time career woman to a work-from-home mom, I was thrust into the need for community in my life.  I’d say that need was always there, but the overwhelming loneliness I felt when I spent days alone with my one- year-old gave me lots of time to think about what life would look life if I was more dependent on others, and likewise if I could make myself useful to my friends, community, and those in need.  As I have been involved in the BabyNet Community that has developed in south central Kentucky, I’ve learned that the giving and receiving of gifts is a key component to developing meaningful relationships.  I’ve witnessed parents come together via facebook and monthly meetings with the sole focus of sharing experiences.  What has allowed this group of more than 700 members to thrive in a world that often leaves us tattered and worn?  I believe it’s their willingness to share with one another.  A mom shares her need for a sitter, cooking advice, or a day at the park while another offers things that she doesn’t need such as clothing, cloth diapers, or coupons.  The exchanging of gifts is what unites them and allows for face-to-face connection.  They know one another’s names and care about each other’s’ children. 

We aren’t quick to alienate those people on whom we are dependent and with whom we develop authentic relationships.  The witnessing of this giving, in return, encourages us to do the same.  I want to surround myself with others who are generous because it increases my selflessness and encourages me to depend on others.  A group of chickens and a pair of shoes are exchanged for work experiences on our farm.  Excess produce in my garden is traded for dresses my girls love to wear.  It’s not forced and no one expects anything in return, but rather we all find joy in spreading our wealth.

In doing some research on this idea of the circle of gifts, I found a group in California that meets weekly to replicate a time-honored ritual of meeting each other’s needs.  The members of the group stands or sits in a circle and take turns going around the room to express their needs and gifts they have to offer.  One by one a need is met by the generosity of another in the room.   Similarly, I’ve seen this with the BabyNet group as they’ve met at a farmers market to exchange a stack of too large men’s shirts or jars of canned fruit.  There becomes an acceptance and dependence on one another that is not often seen.  Beyond physical gifts, the group shares knowledge with one another as they meet for monthly meetings on topics that relate to parenting a child.  Like what happens in the meetings in California, parents involved in BabyNet are connected because they know that they will have this sacred time once a month to discuss their needs and share their knowledge with one another.  Trades, sales, and gifts have naturally become an important aspect of these monthly gatherings. 


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Women gather in a circle - photo via George Eastman House Collection. (right) Parents and professionals gather in a circle at the monthly BabyNet meetings held at the WKU ALIVE Center.
I’m humbled as I look at a gift given to me by my daughter.  It’s a drawing very similar to every drawing she creates for me:  a stick figure version of herself standing next to a stick figure version of me doing something simple like baking, working in the garden, or having a picnic.  This gift she gives me reflects what matters most to her, not a toy or a new dress, but my time and energy devoted to simple moments between the two of us.  In the Foxfire Book series, the students in author Eliot Wiggington’s class realize this same thing about the community of mountain people who had so much to offer, but were quickly losing people who cared.  By simply spending time with them and watching them create their gifts, the gift of knowledge was received and could then be passed on to others.

It appears that a financial peak has been reached (at least for our lifetime) and that a gift culture might be one solution to handling difficult times.  Those living in a gift culture pass on their excess rather than allowing it to accumulate or be thrown away.  Our wealth begins to circulate rather than leaving many with unmet needs.  It occurred to me that this is why those living in the greatest poverty often have the most meaningful relationships.   When we are purchasing locally and living more simply, we begin making better purchasing decisions.  We find ourselves as consumers of items with less packaging and of higher quality so it lasts longer.   The less money we spend, the less time we are required to work, and this allows for more time to care for one another.

The increased momentum in the buy local movement seems to be drawn to this sense of knowing your producer.  It allows us to be more than consumers, making us participants in a system where creativity replaces over-consumption. When you build a relationship with your farmer, she may not have exactly what you need right now, but you can make a request for it to be grown the next year.  You can buy one- of-a-kind clothing that was made with artistic expression and creativity rather than being mass produced.  Even though money is exchanged, the item becomes of greater value because of the relationship that is developed.   When you buy food or a gift from a homegrown business, you are helping a family you know pay bills, a college student pay off loans, or a newlywed couple live out their dreams.  You build connections and make an immediate difference in someone’s life, and they do the same for you.


For more information about BabyNet visit:  www.babynetky.com

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Preserving Summer

8/5/2012

1 Comment

 
My journey toward living more simply began with summers in Canada alongside my grandmother.   Hair pulled up, aprons on, we would roll out dough, gather fruits and vegetables from the garden, and wash laundry by hand.  When I was younger (and particularly during my teen years), I never really understood why my grandparents left their home in New York with all the perks of modern living to spend summers in the small cabin that left them almost entirely self-sufficient.  My grandmother told me later it was because the only way to not lose skills was to use them.  Preserving the harvest of summer nearly became a lost art.  It now seems to be making a resurgence -- primarily due to the farming men and women who seek value in the simple things and are willing to share them with others.

I was thrilled to learn that Community Farmers’ Market in Bowling Green, KY had received a grant from Ball Canning Company to spread the message of the benefits of canning fresh and local foods while they are in season.  A simple guide, free samples, and jars have been given out not only at the market by local chefs and farmers, but throughout the community at special events and through organization promoting healthy food choices.  It is exciting that I am not the only one wanting to learn a skill that I fondly remember my grandmother using years ago.  And, while I love delicious preserves and pickles as an occasional treat, when I decided to can, I began researching options that use less refined sugars and salts. 


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Q. Tell us a little about yourself and why you are passionate about good food.

A.   As a wife and mother, I naturally have the desire to feed my family well and to provide for their physical, emotional, and spiritual health. I saw my mother overcome major health issues when I was a teenager just by changing her diet and this had a strong impact on me. So when I became a wife and mother, I wanted to do the best that I could do to provide for my own family's health.

Q Why do you believe that it is important to buy local food (or grow it yourself)?


A. Our industrialized food system is not only unsafe, but devoid of nutrients. When food is being shipped and trucked in from all over the world, there is no accountability for the safety of that food. Food loses its freshness and flavor.  Also, after spending days and weeks in transport to your dinner table, nutrient loss is dramatic. We must ask ourselves, "Why do we eat?" Is it for pure enjoyment? If that’s the case, then I want food that tastes good! Do we eat just to fill our bellies? If this is the case, then where our food comes from doesn't matter. Do we want food that tastes good and is truly healthy-giving? If so, we must consume foods that are fresh and local. When you know who your farmer is and how that food was raised, you can feel secure that your family is consuming safe, healthy, nutritious, and tasty food!

Q Do you have suggestions for using less sugar, salt, and preservatives in preserved foods?


A. Our culture has been conditioned to not recognize or enjoy the diversity of flavors available to us, but instead to crave sweet and salt. These cravings are intense and, in reality, misguided. The variety of flavors available to us is immense, but we have limited ourselves to such a small fraction of tastes, most of which are based on salt or sugar.  Our forefathers enjoyed a much wider variety of flavors, from savory to salty to piquant, as well as sweet (in much smaller amounts than our culture is accustomed to).  Not only are we missing the true enjoyment that comes from a diversity of foods, but we are damaging our health in the process. Sugar fuels obesity and diabetes, feeds cancer, causes acne, etc. Refined salt causes edema, influences heart disease, and holds our bodies in a constant state of toxicity. And of course, artificial preservatives, flavors and colors have a wide array of ill effects on our bodies. In the past, people "put up" their food without the excessive use of sugar, and put unrefined salt to good use by naturally curing, drying, brining, and fermenting the harvest. These techniques enhanced the flavors of food as well as the nutrients – not by making them sweet or salty, but by allowing the natural flavors to develop as they should.


Q Why is fermenting foods so important and what is the easiest way to get started?

A. Fermented foods are a powerhouse of flavor and nutrition! They provide an intensity of nutrients and enzymes to enhance digestion, while adding beneficial microflora to the gut. These foods are what our ancestors thrived on! And it is so very easy to preserve your foods through fermentation and there is no unpleasant heat like there is in canning. Plus, no electricity is required. The easiest thing to begin with is turning cabbage into sauerkraut. All that is required is cabbage and unrefined salt! Simply chop the cabbage as thin as possible, toss it into a large bowl with some salt (about 1 tablespoon per average-sized head), squeeze until the juices are released, and then pack into jars, ensuring that there is about 1-2" of brine covering the solids. I like to save 1 nice cabbage leaf for the top to push and hold the solids down under the liquid. Cover the jar loosely with the lid to allow gases to escape. Leave it out on the counter for a few days and before you know it, you have sauerkraut!


Q What are your favorite recipes for preserving summer harvests?

A. One of my favorite things to make and put away in the summer is fermented salsa. (Remember, all our condiments were fermented prior to the advent of canning and cheap refined salt and sugar!) I take fresh tomatoes, still warm from my garden, and chop them up with a piece of chili pepper and a few cloves of garlic. I add liquid whey (also used in yogurt or cheese-making), fresh lime juice, chopped cilantro, and a little salt. Let this mixture sit out on the counter for 24 hours and you have a delightfully tasty salsa that is hard to resist




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Several local organizations including the WKU Alive Center, Community Farmers Market, BabyNet Ky and several volunteers have been working hard to take the Discover You Can project out into the community.  We are excited to be partnering with CEDARS, Corazones Cristianos, and The Foundry Christian Development Center to host a Salsa Canning Workshop that will also include discussion and demonstrations on freezing and drying the summers harvests.  This workshop is for everyone and I’m certain that anyone who attends will learn a lot!  At the same time it is going to be a great way to connect to local refugee and immigrant families who are being introduced to new foods they may have never eaten.  This workshop will be an introduction to what can be grown in South Central, KY and what to do with those foods.  Like last years canning workshop we hope that these families will share their own tips and techniques they have brought from their own countries.

Salsa Canning Workshop hosted by Community Farmers Market

August 11th  2-4 p.m.

Hosted by Community Farmers’ Market, CEDARS, WKU ALIVE Center, AMIGOS

For more information visit:  communityfarmersmarketbg.com


1 Comment

    Michelle Howell   

    Michelle is a wife,
    mother, farmer, writer and speaker passionately helping families overcome obstacles and find their best through healthier habits, better birth experiences and authentic connection within their present community.  She does this by speaking truth and shedding light on ways real people can work together to create change.

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